Have you ever noticed that there can be two people can look at the very same situation and have very different opinions of it? How can that be? If their reality is absolutely the same, why is one person so happy and the other so down? The answer is perception.
One of the universal laws states that nothing in this world is inherently good or bad. It just is. What makes it negative or positive is the emotion that you assign to it. So, while you may label something “bad,” for instance, I may actually label it as “good.” Let me give you an example.
When a friend of mine was given the chance to move from her home state in Michigan to California with a man that she had been seeing for almost a year (he was offered his dream job 2,500 miles from home), most of her friends and family labeled it as “bad.” They kept telling her how she was going to miss them terribly. They told her that the idea of quitting her 15-year long career in law enforcement and following her dream of being a writer was just plain silly, not to mention the fact that she’d be doing all of this for a guy she “barely knew.” Her life was going to get harder and that wasn’t a good thing.
Initially, she agreed with them. She kept thinking that this was going to be the most foolish thing she’d ever done and she had almost talked herself right out of it. Almost.
One day she was having a heart-to-heart conversation with herself, trying to end her internal struggles about what to do when she suddenly realized that she had been looking at the situation all wrong. It wasn’t about what she was going to give up if she made the move. No, she needed to look at what she would gain.
She could be with the man that she loved in a state that promised opportunity (and sunshine, which is something Michigan tends to lack) and in the midst of a career that finally fulfilled her. I’m happy to report that that is exactly what she has today, simply because she changed her perception, which ultimately changed her reality.
Granted, there are going to be times when you struggle with what is happening in your life, making it difficult to change your perception and that is okay. However, at some point it benefits you to come to terms with whatever is going on in your world and consciously decide to find the good in it so that your reality is one with more laughter than tears.
So, the next time that you’re struggling with something, ask yourself what good may come of it. Will it bring you and your family closer together? Will it push you toward a new career that is potentially more satisfying than the one that you just had? What is it that you will gain from the situation?
The time in your life is going to pass anyway, so you might as well make it the best it can be. Considering the alternative, what do you have to lose – other than sadness and pain? I’ll take that chance any day.